The Lord is My Helper

The Lord is My Helper

Naomi Colelay

My name is Naomi Colelay. I’ve lived on the White Mountain Apache Reservation all my life. As a child, I had both parents in the home. My mom was a very busy lady. I have six other siblings, and she cared for us all. My dad worked a lot. He was an alcoholic— which brought alcohol into the home, but home life was good. Then I was molested at a young age. That threw me way off track. My lifestyle, my thoughts, and my ways began to change. I became very shy and didn’t really speak out much, but I stayed in school.

In high school I discovered alcohol and started smoking marijuana. At the age of seventeen I was raped. I couldn’t deal with all the mess that I was in at that time, so I just quit high school and got more into alcohol. It became a part of my life. Later when I was married, we also got into drug dealing. I lived that life for so many years. And through it all, there were a lot of lonely times. I couldn’t make my marriage work. I eventually attempted suicide—feeling that I couldn’t make my life work either.

I was one that would not recognize danger if I saw it; I would walk right into it. As a teenager, I remember we made a run down to Phoenix for some marijuana. We were at apartment buildings, and there were some guys there who had a pistol. I walked right up and asked them if they had used it before. They just stood there and watched me. I would do stupid things like that because I didn’t have guidance at that time about what was right or wrong. I wanted to be on my own at a young age. I would do things like that and not care.

That’s why I would leave my children and not even care who was watching them. We became a family that was so bound by drugs. And when we started dealing drugs, it became a day-in and day-out thing— with desperate people coming by at all hours of the day and night.

One day I was sitting at home and just feeling worthless and helpless. I didn’t have many friends that I could talk with about what I was going through. I always felt there was something missing in my life. I came very close to suicide that day. I found my husband’s pistol and put it to my head. But something stopped me. On my wall there was a picture that just came floating down the wall right to my feet. It was a picture of my daughter when she was in Head Start. I remembered the morning that picture was taken—I was fixing her hair, and we were having a good time. I didn’t know what to do. I was always running, but I had nowhere to go. I felt hopeless.

But on February 24, 2007, I found God! I remember the day exactly because my husband got arrested and those same hopeless feelings were back again. “What do I do? Where do I go?” I remembered my son had a coach who was a Christian, and I called him up. He told me there were ladies who met for a Bible study, and he had them come visit me.

That day was the turning point in my life—when God Himself helped me. I totally surrendered everything to God, and He changed my life. My husband also surrendered to God, and his life was also changed!

The thief cometh…to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. –John 10:10

Looking back over my life, I have learned that God does not lie. He will protect you through everything. When I gave my life to the Lord, I asked God to forgive me for ruining all those lives and homes by selling drugs. So many lives were broken because I sold drugs to people. I prayed to the Lord that things would change for them and make life better for them too.

I had worked at the casino for many years. I began to pray, “Lord, put me somewhere else. Put me in a place where I can do things for You—put me to work!” In January of 2008, God brought me to a ministry called the Living Hope Women’s Center. God placed a woman in my path who really helped me.

I realized that from my childhood into my adulthood, I had grown up with a lot of lies in my life. I grew up believing in things that weren’t even true. I prayed, “Lord, take that junk from me. Get rid of all the junk in my heart—tear it out by the roots!” That was my prayer!

Sure enough, the Lord started working on me. Piece by piece, He started putting my heart back together. All that I have done—all the shame and the guilt that I grew up with—started to leave. I’m very thankful today that God has done so much work in me. And now I must share this help with you! There are so many Scriptures that I stand on. I quote them every day to help me to get through hard times.

You may be bound by drugs or alcohol. You may be one who has lost your children to the system. You may be one who is sitting in jail wondering what to do next or which way to go. God is the way! There is nowhere else to turn, so turn to Him! He will never let you down.

…for He hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my Helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me. –Hebrews 13:5-6

I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made Heaven and earth. –Psalm 121:1-2

Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. –Hebrews 4:16

Can These Wounds Be Healed?

If Naomi’s story of overcoming abuse has touched your heart, we encourage you to read this article about finding healing in the midst of great hurt.

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